It’s about time. At the beginning of 2017, I told myself as I do every Jan 1st, “This is going to be your year”.
And it has.
Here’s what happened. I got tired of seeing people on the gram and Facebook with the optimistic attitude, crucial summer internship, perfect highlight, and not being able to relate. I was never particularly stylish. By the time I figured out what the cool new shoes were, they were damn near phased out. I washed my face with dial soap and didn’t think twice about it. I asked people how they were doing but could never really listen for more than 3 minutes. I guess you could best describe my attitude as unbothered. And that’s not bad, but it sure as hell wasn’t enough.
So I stopped worrying about what other people think of me just enough to start being myself on 1000. I don’t have to preface every question I ask with a timid “I’m sorry, this may be dumb but…”. I do my best to put in the work for what I want, and not ask for favors. I can go a week without wearing makeup, or walk into the gym in a full face, and give an equal amount of fucks. (Zero). There’s nothing wrong with spending 5 consecutive hours on your couch watching Netflix with a pint of ice cream, and theres nothing wrong with wearing heels even though everyone else is wearing flats. Do you.
But all this fitness stuff… beauty stuff… spiritual stuff… it’s so much work!
Yeah, and thats exactly what I love about it. I’m not the type to sit around staring at a wall all day during my free time. If I’m going to pour my time and attention into something, why not myself? That’s not to say this is a self-absorbed lifestyle per se. My inner beauty glo- service to others, spiritual growth, practicing kindness and tolerance- is even more important than my outer beauty glo. But there is something so magical in admitting, just for once, you care! I love shaving 20 seconds off my mile time and thinking “daaaaamn olympics 2020 we comin’ for you”. I love walking past the mirror and thinking “wow… I think I finally got this color combination thing down!” I love being able to throw a stranger a full smile and be okay with whatever response I get- positive or negative. I love letting shit slide right off my back, and I love to stunt. Ain’t nothing wrong with a try hard. What else do you call spending 15 minutes filling in one damn eyebrow? Embrace you. Be unapologetically yourself. Glo the fuck up.